Colton Haynes has finally opened up about his drug and alcohol addiction. He claims that his drug and alcohol use increased after he came out as a homosexual in 2016.
The young actor revealed that he is now six months sober after completing a four-month treatment program.
He admitted to Attitude Magazine, “In 10 years, there were maybe 25 days I didn’t drink, I remember when I started, it was a couple glasses of wine, and it regressed into really dark times.”
Haynes has admitted that drinking and drug use has been a part of his life for the past decade, but his “downward spiral” really started after coming out.
“I came out and, in a way, my downward spiral started,” he said. “I felt extremely free but at the same time the amount of attention I was getting was making me spin out of control.”
As Haynes began adjusting to the new attention brought from the coming out, his personal life began to crumble. The actor’s mother passed away in May 2018 after a long battle with advanced cirrhosis of the liver. Shortly after the sad loss, Hayne’s announced his divorce from his husband Jeff Leatham after less than a year of marriage.
He stated, “I got married and that didn’t work out. That was extremely public and heart-breaking, and right when that was going on, my mom died,” he said. “At that point, I fell apart. My brain broke. I was doing a massive comedy for a studio, showed up to work and got fired on the first day. They said I looked as if I had ‘dead in my eyes’, and I did. “
Hayne’s said that at that point he started relying on drugs and alcohol more than ever.
“I got so heavily involved with drugs and alcohol to mask the amount of pain I was feeling that I couldn’t even make some decisions for myself. I was drowning in my own s—,”
The young actor admitted that he finally hit his rock bottom when he woke up in an L.A hotel after a seven-day bender.
“I locked myself in a hotel room at the Waldorf Astoria in Beverly Hills for seven days and was found in my room with these insane bruises all over my body,” he recalled. “It looked as if somebody had beaten the shit out of me. I couldn’t walk, so I was falling everywhere.”
“I almost ruptured my kidney, ended up in the hospital, ended up in 5150 psyche hold,” he said. “I was on such a destructive path that I could not function.”
He continued: “I lost partial sight in my left eye for a while. I ended up having two seizures. I didn’t know any of this was happening until I was sober enough to remember it.”
“If anyone else had told me to get help I would be like ‘F— you!’. I had to make that decision on my own. I was ready to stop running from my own problems,” he said. “Once I went to treatment, I found this amazing amount of true love for myself, and started figuring out who I am without those vices, and recognizing the people in my life who lifted me up instead of tearing me down.”
Now after being six months sober, Haynes admitted that his main goal is to contribute towards ending the stigma around addiction. He wants to encourage others who are struggling to speak out.
“I’m always going to be in recovery. There are so many people struggling out there, but not a lot of them talk about it. Life is much more beautiful than I could have imagined,” he said.
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